If Everything Speaks, Your Body Is Shouting: Nonverbal Skills for Success

If everything you do speaks for you (and it does), your body is probably shouting before you even open your mouth.

When we talk about communication at work, at home, on Zoom, on a stage – wherever – most people focus on the words. The emails. The talking points. The scripts. And sure, words matter. But if your tone, body language, or eye contact don’t line up with your words, the message you think you’re delivering isn’t landing.

Research shows that nonverbal communication plays a dominant role in how messages are received, sometimes accounting for more than 55% of perceived meaning (with tone of voice accounting for 38% and specific words accounting for 7% of meaning). That means even if you say all the “right” things, your nonverbal cues could be working against you.

Why Nonverbal Communication Makes or Breaks You

Think of communication as a car. Words are the engine – you need them to get anywhere. But nonverbal communication? It's the oil. Without it, the engine grinds, sputters, and eventually fails. Nonverbal signals – tone of voice, posture, facial expressions, eye contact – either make your words believable or make people wonder if you mean what you say at all.

When your words and your body match, you drive understanding, trust, action, excitement. When they don't, you confuse people, lose credibility, and stall out yourself and the team.

Three Keys to Conquering Nonverbal Communications

1. Tone of Voice: Set the Mood

Your tone sets the emotional stage for what people are about to hear. Are you confident? Engaged? Bored? Mad? They’ll know, whether you intend them to or not. Practice matching your tone to your message. If you're delivering exciting news, sound excited. If you're delivering tough news, slow down, be serious. Your tone needs to carry the emotional weight, not race past it.

2. Body Language: Own the Room (Without the Jazz Hands)

How you sit, stand, and move signals how much you believe in what you're saying. Slouching, fidgeting, or crossing your arms suggests nervousness or defensiveness. Standing tall, using open gestures (not flailing!), and keeping relaxed shoulders make you seem approachable and credible. 

3. Eye Contact: Connect Without Creeping People Out

Good eye contact builds trust. Avoiding it says "I don't care" or "I'm not confident." But constant, unblinking eye contact can feel aggressive. Aim for natural eye contact about 60-70% of the time in a one-on-one conversation. In a group, scan the room. Sweep, stop, connect, move on. It's not just about seeing people; it's about making them feel seen. 

Everyday Pitfalls – and How to Dodge Them

Crossed arms? Defensive. Avoiding eye contact? Disengaged. Checking your phone or watch? Rude. Even a subtle eye roll or a smirk (looks in mirror) can completely derail how people interpret your message, no matter what your message may be.

Your words may say “great job,” but if you’re staring into your shoes, arms crossed, monotone voice? What they hear is “I don’t mean it.”

Bottom Line: Everything Speaks

If everything speaks – and it does – you need your tone, body, and eyes backing you up, not undermining you. The best communicators aren't just good with words. They're are experts of silent signals. They're believable because everything about them matches their message.

So next time you say "great job" to your team, make sure your body’s shouting it loud and clear.